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Saying 'sorry' doesn't have to be hard

A sincere apology does a world of good for both the giver and the receiver. It shows you regret the hurt or pain you caused, whether that’s inadvertently or on purpose, and it signals your desire to restore the relationship to a healthy balance.

Without apologizing, authenticity cannot be achieved because authenticity requires you to appropriately express your feelings and needs.  

Why apologizing is good for you and others

1. Provides a constructive outlet for remorse. Extending an apology helps you take responsibility for your actions and hold yourself accountable for them. This is especially true if you back up your words with positive actions to prevent it happening again. Holding on to remorse can lead to internalized anger which over time can impact your sense of self-worth.  

 

2. Improves your future conduct. By reflecting on your actions and sharing your experience with another person, you create an experience which encompasses your...

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10 Savvy ways to develop self-awareness

“Self-knowledge is the first step to maturity” Jane Austen.

 

You come into the world alone and you spend every minute with yourself until you depart the world, yet you may not know yourself as well as you think you do.

 

Unfortunately, if you don’t know yourself, it’s hard to make progress. It’s like driving a car that doesn’t run well, but you refuse to look under the hood to optimize the engine. Unfortunately, those issues won’t repair themselves. They may well get worse and stop your car from running.

When I think of self-awareness I’m always reminded of the Johari Window developed by  psychologists Joseph Luft (1916-2014) and Harrington Ingham (1916-1995), which is a tool used to demonstrate four levels of self-awareness:

 

  1. I know what I know about myself and you know it too (Known)
  2. I don’t know that about me but you know it about me (Blind Spot)
  3. We don’t know what we don’t know about me...
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Hypercritical people: 7 Strategies for dealing with them

Love them or loathe them, they’re out there! If you haven’t come across one in your lifetime yet, consider yourself lucky. I have had the misfortune to come across a few in my working career and honestly, I don’t feel better for it.

 

Fortunately, they’re easier to avoid outside of work.

 

Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m all up for feedback and improving my performance however when the feedback feels like nitpicking and makes you feel useless then you know it’s more about them than it is about you. Something I wish I’d known when it first happened to me.

 

Over the years I have learned that these people struggle to experience joy, because if they did, what would there be to give feedback on? Many I believe are looking for perfection to help them feel safe and control their environment. Another way they can do this is to take great pleasure in picking out ‘mistakes’ and bringing them to your attention. This...

Continue Reading...

10 Savvy ways to develop self-awareness

 “Self-knowledge is the first step to maturity” Jane Austen.

 

You come into the world alone and you spend every minute with yourself until you depart the world, yet you may not know yourself as well as you think you do.

 

Unfortunately, if you don’t know yourself, it’s hard to make progress. It’s like driving a car that doesn’t run well, but you refuse to look under the hood to optimize the engine. Unfortunately, those issues won’t repair themselves. They may well get worse and stop your car from running.

 

Adapted Image by Flixabout.com

 

When I think of self-awareness I’m always reminded of the Johari Window developed by psychologists Joseph Luft (1916-2014) and Harrington Ingham (1916-1995), which is a tool used to demonstrate four levels of self-awareness:

 

  1. I know what I know about myself and you know it too (Open )
  2. I don’t know that about me but you know it about me (Blind)
  3. We don’t...
Continue Reading...
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