If I had a dollar for every time a client lamented to me that they lacked self-discipline, I’d be a very wealthy person right now.
Everyone feels overwhelmed and bogged down by the things they need to get done each day. You’re not alone. Sometimes, you just don't want to do anything – certainly not how you thought you would feel. But deep down, you know that to be successful, you need to take regular action and find a way to get things done.
It doesn't matter whether you feel like it or not; you just have to do it. Successful people know that, and they have managed to find a way to get things done even when they don’t want to! They have worked out how to motivate themselves.
The beauty about motivation is that it doesn't have to come from within. Instead, you can get it from outside sources like a friend or a coach, or from within yourself – even your future self.
You don't have to wait for motivation. You...
No matter how you divide up the 2023 calendar year, there are still 365 days in it. If you work full-time with 21 days of annual leave, you’ll have 245 working days to achieve whatever it is you want to achieve professionally, and a little bit more time for what you want to achieve personally. For some that idea can be daunting however it doesn’t have to be. In order to achieve your goals, you need consistent habits to support them. To maintain consistency, you need to take care of your physical and mental health.
Taking care of your mind is just as important as taking care of your body. Unfortunately, it’s easy to forget that in the busyness of the day-to-day. After all, it’s obvious if you exercised instead of watching TV or ate salmon for dinner rather than fried chicken. How you treat your mind is usually less visible and more difficult to track.
To stay on top of things, it helps to develop easy habits that fit into your usual...
Have you been sitting on a decision hoping that the answer will emerge only to find that waiting for it is making you feel more agitated and upset? That is how many of my clients feel before they book in to see me.
In the last couple of weeks, I have started working with a number of people who are struggling to reach a decision on their own. This is not because they lack the necessary decision-making skills or that they lack the necessary information to make the decision but more because whichever decision they make, someone close to them will be upset or let down.
These aren’t decisions about what car to buy, although it’s important, but rather life-changing ones like which country to live in, who to settle down with or to start a family or not. These decisions tend to take more time and require deeper thought so it’s not unusual for you to sit on them and wait for an indication on what to decide. However, if waiting for a clue is...
Self-care is often seen as a luxury, but did you know it can lead to a longer, happier life? Without self-care, you’re likely to end up feeling stressed, tired, and generally unhappy.
Below, I share with you 5 Ways a lack of self-care can lead to an unhappy life. You will also learn some of the signs to watch out for to indicate that you need more self-care in your life.
When you aren’t taking care of yourself, you’re not replenishing your energy reserves and as a result you’ll often feel stressed and exhausted. This in turn can lead to burnout and a feeling of resentment. For example, it could be that you are exhausted from taking care of everyone else’s needs. Over time, if you don’t factor in self-care activities, you could end up resenting your loved ones.
When you are constantly exhausted and stressed out, it’s impossible to maintain a positive outlook. Self-care helps to...
In a world of constant activity with a steady onslaught of attention-grabbing distractions, the idea of a silent mind can seem like a distant and unlikely possibility. However, the need for silence is profound and can be crucial across life circumstances.
As children we were often told by my mum ‘Shh, silence is golden”, I’d never heard the second part until today. Growing up I never quiet understood the phrase “silence is golden” until I had my own children. While they weren't particularly noisy per se, it felt very noisy to me. And how I would yearn for silence when they were young. And now as an adult juggling multiple projects at work and at home, I have found myself regularly seeking out silence in the form of a 10-day silent retreat to help me rejuvenate and get back to myself. It quickly became one of my annual self-care activities.
I attended my first retreat in 2015. This was not by choice, rather it was a...
So often I find myself explaining to clients that the first step in overcoming their hurt or disappointment is accepting the situation, and their part in how they got there. And for many that is the hardest part of their transformation because self-acceptance requires you to recognize your imperfections and accept them for what they are. Rather than condemning yourself, blaming others or focusing on what they need to fix, a more effective strategy is adopting self-acceptance.
Without self-acceptance, it is very difficult to create lasting change or progress through your painful situation. Afterall you can only control yourself and your responses. Everything else is a lottery.
Reading this, you may be thinking of course I accept myself! It might all seem like a no-brainer to you. But what happens when you reflect on this question, "Do I accept myself?" it might feel odd, it may even not sit well with you as you hear yourself say it. After all, what does...
The holiday season is always a time of great excitement, thankfulness, and (hopefully) relaxation, but there are also a variety of reasons why the most wonderful time of the year may leave some feeling stressed out.
During the holidays, it’s important to monitor your stress levels and ensure that you’re having an enjoyable and restful time with your friends and family – not leaving yourself feeling frazzled! One in four (1:4) people report being stressed about the Christmas holidays and one in six (1:6) report this time of year as stressful as divorce, moving house and changing jobs.
To prepare yourself for the holidays, it’s important to familiarise yourself with the top 6 holiday stressors.
1 - Entertaining guests
2 - Living up to the hype
3 – Spending money
4 – Dealing with unpleasant family members
5 – Mental Health
6 – Physical Health
If you’ve ever wanted to sleep well but thought it was a pipedream, then you’ll want to read this blog article. In this article, I provide an overview of 5 potential solutions to your sleep problem.
After deciding to specialise in sleep counselling for professionals three years ago, I have learnt a thing or two about what works for adult sleep clients. Clients who come looking for solutions to get to sleep quicker and stay asleep have often read the top 5 sleep books and are still struggling to sleep well. They are also generous reviewers of retail products in the sleep market. I often receive unsolicited feedback about what they have tried and what helps them get to sleep and stay asleep.
As a psychotherapist and counsellor, I know that anxiety, even low levels, can affect sleep quality. However, I also recognise that falling sleep is the result of a combination of biology, mental and physical states coming together at the right time, in the...
It’s often easier said than done. Setting and maintaining boundaries can be hard when others are accustomed to you not having any. Whether we like to admit it or not, people take advantage of other people.
In my practice I have seen an increase in professionals seeking assistance for languishing and falling out of love with their work because they feel they have nothing left to give. Getting through the day without added tasks is a challenge for some. For others, it has already impacted significant relationships.
In project management terms it’s called ‘scope creep’ and it plays right into our need to belong and be of service. Depending on your experience it could also be playing into your need for financial security.
When others take advantage of our kindness, it leads to resentment...
As I write this, I am reminded of a well-known retreat leader who started a 7-day silent retreat with, “I have no plans of what to talk about this week, you each have needs and so I am going to use the emerging curriculum to guide our experience together.” Well, you can imagine the looks that were exchanged by the nearly 250 participants who had made special efforts to be there. They were incredulous that there was no set curriculum for the week, leaving them to wonder if they had done the right thing by being there. Of course, the retreat was a deeply moving experience for each and every one of us and I’m somehow reminded of this as Sydney enters it’s 8th week of lockdown.
The pandemic it seems has an emerging curriculum for each of us, and who knows what it is. What I do know is that we each have something to learn from this experience.
And like every crisis we have to go through it rather than around, so here are some ideas to increase your...